LOSE WEIGHT WITH ME
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Want More Lightness? Try a Ritual

Dec 12, 2018

 


 

I went to a coming of age ceremony (aka Bat Mitzvah) this last weekend. So moving.

 

I understand why there is such a thing.

 

Because once someone reaches the age of 13ish, they are no longer a child-child. The baby-toddler-little kid part of their life (and therefore their parents’ lives) is over.

 

The focus is different.

 

It’s no longer about keeping them from wandering into the street and reading them bedtime stories (sniffle), it’s about keeping them safe with boundaries and advice (yeah, good luck with that :).

 

It’s a totally different experience for both the child and the parent. And it’s good to acknowledge that difference to ourselves and the greater community.

 

Because once we acknowledge a transition, we can:

See it

Grieve it

Love it

Change it

Confirm it

Honor it

Share it

Learn from it

Take responsibility for it

Own it

 

Which allows us to move forward with more ease.

 

If we don’t notice or acknowledge, the change happens anyway, but we don’t grieve or honor or learn. We miss the opportunity and we get depressed and we regret and we stay stuck.

 

Depression, regret and stagnation often lead to self-soothing and for many of us that involves lots of food.

 

And extra weight.  

 

Then the depression gets worse because we feel fat . . . and the cycle begins.

We think we’re depressed about the weight, but really it’s about not accepting and grieving a transition.

 

Maybe we didn’t have time or we didn’t realize the change would be such a big deal. Or we just couldn’t handle the big feelings all at once.

 

It’s OK. There’s good news: you can have a do-over. You can start at any time.

 

See if there aren’t any transitions you glossed over, or if any are coming up, and consider a formal acknowledgement, a ritual.

 

Create a ritual for anything that felt like or feels like a shift.

Anything where there might be a before and after.

 

It could be for big things: a death, a move, a job change, a relationship change

 

Or for smaller seeming things: the day beginning, the day ending, boundary setting, starting something new, ending a habit

 

The ritual doesn’t have to be elaborate (but could be!). We’re looking for a deep acknowledgement.

 

Light a candle.

Write a letter and burn it in the fireplace.

Throw pebbles into water.

Say it out loud.

Close your eyes.

Recite a prayer.

Walk a path.

 

Do this alone or with witnesses.

 

If nothing is coming to mind, the beginning of a New Year invites reflection and goal setting. And it’s the perfect time for a ritual.

 

Deep acknowledgment of the past year’s triumphs and mistakes allows for growth, forgiveness and lightness moving forward.

 

Both emotional and physical.